Ever get the feeling that you just aren’t even there?
I have been having that feeling a lot lately. For the past four years I have been working to build the theater program at the school. For the past two years I have worked like mad to get things done in the old and aging auditorium. I have been the go to guy for theater related things.
After I announced I was leaving, strange things have been happening. I have become like the title character in the movie “The Man Who Wasn’t There”. It’s like I have already left. My principal and assistant principal have stopped informing me of what is happening with the theater position, my former arts teammates have started in on my Technical Director to get things done and to plan for next year, while the students are just concerned with who is going to replace me.
I’m not crying about it or anything, it is just an interesting phenomenon. It also makes it a little bit harder to get things done through the end of the year – since communication isn’t coming my way. I guess that since everyone knows that I am leaving – there isn’t really a point in investing time and energy into the collegial relationship or friendship.
But, can I really blame them? After all I am the one who decided to leave this all behind.
I just found out that I will miss Thanksgiving this year. The International Schools Theater Association (ISTA) has a big conference every year and AIS/D attends. Since I will be taking over the Middle School Theater program, I am in charge of arranging and chaperoning.
But don’t be sad, because while I will miss my family on Thanksgiving, I will be in New Delhi meeting with theater educators and theater artists from around the world. I will get to take a group of 20 kids, the best and the brightest, who will audition to go, for a fantastic experience.
So, I may miss Turkey, I may miss getting stuffed, and I may miss lounging on the couch watching football, but I will be giving thanks for my new teaching post and the perks that go with it.
Recently my dreams have been consumed with the move Bangladesh.
It’s hard to explain because I haven’t even been there, but every dream I can remember is in some way connected. Either it is a dream about being in the classroom, a dream about the flight, or a dream about meeting all the new staff and socializing.
Not a single dream is about a nightmare, which I assume is a good thing, but they are all a little bit surreal. I think because I HAVE NOT EVEN BEEN THERE. Maybe they are a result of the massive amounts of research that we have been doing, or it is the processing of everything involved in the planning process, or maybe it is a subconscious projection of my eagerness to get on with the show.
Come to think of it, most days my thoughts are focused on the move. Interactions I have at school, the last time I will do specific lessons with kids, and the mental saying “good bye” to our house.
So maybe, the dreaming of Bangladesh is a logical step?